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Someone said this to me a long time ago and it took me what seemed like forever to understand the significance of this statement.

This means that I dream and create only from what’s probable and not what’s possible because I don’t know what’s possible.

It also means that the options for what I can experience in my life are very limited.

A great example of this is the career choices I thought I had as I entered college. In my family, it was only acceptable to be a doctor or a lawyer. I had no awareness that there were other careers I could consider. After four years of college, three years in law school and a year in a masters’ program in tax law, I was a practicing attorney…and miserable. At the time, I didn’t see a way out.

This concept made more sense to me when I read a book by Anita Moorjani called Dying to be Me in which she described her near death experience. There were many parts of the book that were eye opening, but what was most impactful to me was her description of our limited perspective of what’s possible. She said that we live as if we are in a big, huge, dark warehouse using only a flashlight to see and know what’s there. During her near death experience, she had the awareness of all the lights going on in the warehouse and she could see everything – things she had never seen or even dreamed of and the things she did know, she was able to see in a different context. She talked of awe and wonder and I remember being envious of what she felt and frustrated that I couldn’t have that too.

Did I need to have a near death experience to have that kind of awareness?

Something in me said that wasn’t true but I didn’t have any proof of that.

I knew there needed to be an easier way and I have been determined to figure out how.

What could I do to expand my perspective of what was possible? How could I experience awe and wonder in my life? How could I break free of the limited life I was living and the limited beliefs that I carried?

While I certainly don’t have all the answers, I feel like I have made some good progress in my own life.

The first step was the awareness that there was more to life and my perspective than I had been exposed to.

The second step was figuring out ways to tap into that. I am, by nature, curious and if a topic interests me, I read everything I can about it. Some people turn to YouTube videos or podcasts. I learn better when reading rather than listening so that’s my go to for learning. Others may absorb information better while listening. I also went to many workshops over many years and tested out different methods that might help.

The third step was taking action. This step was more complicated and required me to push through. even when I didn’t want to. I used energy psychology methods to help me change my old outdated fear based perspectives. I meditated to help me to tap into what’s possible. I nurtured my relationship with God and the idea that love is a state of being that I wanted to live in. I took action in the direction of my newfound dreams.

I’ve stumbled and fallen. I’ve hidden and distracted. I take action and then fall back into old patterns. I admit I am a work in progress. The one thing I do know is that a more expansive life is possible and that always brings me back to doing the work.

I see evidence that this is true each and every day…in my own life, in my family’s life, and in the lives of the people who I work with who commit to doing the work as well. It’s inspiring to be witness to what opens up when that kind of commitment is made.

Perhaps reading this opens up your awareness, even a little bit. Perhaps it inspires you to learn more. And perhaps it inspires you to start taking action.

If you want to know more or would like to engage in a conversation, feel free to reach out to me at, schedule a call at or follow me @belindaphillipshealingcoaching on instagram. You can also follow my daughter’s journey to healing on instagram @stressgirlnomore.

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